I don't like to have fun.
I feel guilty when I have fun. I feel like I'm missing some opportunity to get "one more thing done" or that I'm not fully utilizing my time. Mentally, I cannot calculate anything fun as also being productive and I am very quick to seek productive over fun. I'm always looking for the path of most resistance.
I don't like this approach to life. I don't think busyness and hard work must be synonymous with being miserable. I believe you can be a hard-working, contributing member of society and enjoy it.
I want to be a novelist. Novelists write novels. Thus, I must write. If I write, I am being productive towards my ultimate goal.
So this next week, I am going to work on removing this mental block and belief that my enjoying writing is a bad thing. Does anyone else experience this? What do you to get yourself to relax and enjoy a hobby and not feel guilt about the "should be's"?
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| I went on a morning hike and came across these beauties! Gorgeous. This has nothing to do with this blog post, I know, but I thought you might like this photo and a reminder to go enjoy the nice summer weather today. |
2 comments:
oh man! I feel like so many people think this way! and where did it come from?? i feel like people weren't always as busy as we are today.
I have almost the opposite problem. which can be equally as distressing and lead to just as much criticism from disapproving fellow humans leading to a even more distorted perception of how life ought to be. Leading me to feel guilty about the way i chose to live my life.
i remember having a roommate who was very easily a workaholic in the making. She was constantly saying things to make me feel bad about having more free time than her. For going hiking, writing poetry, reading books and going out with friends while she was working and going to school. (We went to the same massage school at the time and i got way better grades than her, i might add ;).
Anyway, it ate at me after a while. i began to think i was less of a human. that i didn't know how to contribute to the world. FALSE! but i did need to learn how to have more balance in my life. this last year i've worked lots on goal setting and altering my perception of productivity. I think when it comes down to it we need to figure out the right balance for us individually. Because now for me a productive and delicious day is waking up around 9, making omelets for breakfast, doing a massage or two, taking my dogs for a walk, playing some music, doing a couple more massages, reading a few chapters in my book, going out for dinner with a friend and doing some yoga. SO many people would love to criticize me to no end about living this way.They have and they do. but as i was reading on my porch this morning ;) i came across this passage in my book Letters To A Young Poet by Rainer Maria Rilke "...No means of approach is so useless as criticism...Always trust yourself and your own feeling."
We've all been taught by society how we're supposed to live and we all have a lot of inaccurate ideas about how things have to be and those ideas affect us on a deep level. Its easy to compare ourselves. But we're all quite different. We've all got a lot of soul searching to do on this subject, i believe.
anyway :) love you annalisa! hope you're doing well!
Thank you! Brilliant. I agree, I don't get where all the high-pressure, high-stress lifestyle became the new "ideal". Everyone has their pace for living life and we don't need to feel guilty about having time to enjoy hobbies. I think having time to enjoy hobbies makes life much, much more fulfilling.
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